The first year I made this solo was hard. It was quietly hard. I’m not sure if I cried (I was making it a good memory for my own baby after all) but I can still remember the feeling of being right on the edge. Of it being all wrong, making my momma’s dessert without my momma. I could steal a corner out of the fresh batch without a playful scold of ‘heeeeyyyyyy don’t do that!’ (which we both knew she never meant as it would be followed by, “well then give me a taste”).
This is the dish I associate with my momma and Thanksgiving, one of her favorite holidays. A holiday for family and food (her two favorite things). I continue to make this because it IS her now. It brings her as close to our holiday tradition as I’ll ever be able to. We talk about Grandma Patty as I make the dish with my girls. This year B, our oldest, will actually be able to do a lot, if not most, of the work while I likely just try to reign in the chaos that is O, our youngest, who I’m sure will just be trying to stick her hands in all the things!
I shared this recipe once before on our blog, that first year I made it without my momma (you can see that here) because it is no secret family recipe and it would bring me (and my momma) great joy to know it warmed another home this holiday season. Pro “Grandma Patty” changes to this recipe which I recommend 100% (and didn’t do this year just as a test to see if her version really was better … spoiler alert IT IS!). Up the sugar by 1/2 cup (1.5 cup total) & quarter or leave out the nutmeg entirely for a pumpkin base that’s a bit sweeter with more subtle spice.
Oh btw, I’m never not going to eat this FRESH and warm from the oven so if I’m bringing this to your gathering it’s coming with a slice (or three) gone… just deal.